Millions of millennials are struggling to understand the majority of the irony presented to them today, it has been revealed.
Overloaded with a multitude of memes, pseudo-philosophical bullshit, and motivational quotes created by morons who are unable to use apostrophes, today’s young people—often referred to as Generation Y, or even Generation Wuss—have all but lost the ability to discern most forms of irony, satire, or even straight-up sarcasm.
Researchers working for the Institute of Studies—who based their findings primarily on anecdotal evidence and casual observations—were shocked to discover that most young people were “just a bit lacking in a real sense of humour”, opting instead to find amusement in Snapchat filters and Youtube videos of people getting seriously injured. When presented with something genuinely funny, reactions ranged from a blank look of indifference to a brief, fake laugh before returning to a Whatsapp thread about a night out at “Revs”—or, in rare cases, outright indignation at what they felt was some sort of attempt make them feel stupid.
However, some over-thirties have responded in defence of the younger generation. “It’s not their fault,” said Pat Mucci, of Faringham, North Bucks. “They’ve heard the word ‘literally’ being misused so many times they don’t know what the hell. They’re also too young to have heard Alanis Morissette’s hit song, Ironic, and therefore have no idea what to do when some smug twat points out that the lyrics are not, in fact, at all ironic. It’s a confusing time for everyone.”
Mucci added, “I actually think most young people are all right. What they lack in a sense of irony, they make up for in a genuine caring attitude toward stuff like the environment. Besides, who the hell wants to end up as cynical as our generation? We’re f–king miserable.”
When asked by our reporter if he, himself, were being ironic, Mucci just sighed and shook his head, before walking off and swearing under his breath.